Bad hair day. Very bad hair day.

It's all gone wrong, slightly... Work is killing me at the moment, there's so much going on it's unreal.

Then I can't go to watch the second leg Boro-Basel, now that the boys have played them yesterday (pleasure to watch, and very weird to have English commentary). Gutted.

Then I missed out on the (slim, but nevertheless) chance to go to the FA cup semi. Coz I were stupid. Dammit.

Days like these make me sick and angry for some reason, especially thinking that I'll be working till very very late tonight and there's nobody at home I can make responsible for or at least shout at.

Anyway. Nam nulla est sine causa.

This bloke opposite me is eating chrisps and it drives me FUCKING MAD. SHUT YOUR NOISE. I hate that. Keep your mouth shut when you a) eat and b) still stink of booze from the night before. Although, for the records, he's quite alright actually.

Good luck...

How friggin' sweet is this, my best mate has found a guy that ticks all the boxes. Easy you say, but I think it's a major miracle.

Ever since we met at Uni, she wanted to marry a vet, buy a mas in France and live there happily ever after - with dogs, her horse, cats and goats... well you get the picture. It's not like there's vets queing somewhere, actually there are no half-normal guys queuing anywhere... She's been single for a while (we're talking years!) and there was the odd day she was doubting... lowering expectations and all.

Glad she didn't (just for the records, I told her not to! But then again, who am I giving advice anyway), she's met him a while ago and now they're dating. It's so goddamn sweet it makes me cringe!!! And I'm very, very happy for her. Will start knitting baby socks now.

Sow the wind and...

Whatever. I'll stop whinging about men, promise.

Tomorrow sees another major clash and I'll be at the boozer watching it. Need some distraction from work, it's been hell the last couple of weeks and there's days I think I'm loosing it. Note to myself: don't work weekends, it's not worth it.

Got myself new football shoes and tested them yesterday - sun was still out, bliss!

Cough it up...

... and stick it where the sun don't shine!

Suspect A: fancies me big time apparently (should have realised before I agreed going out with him), but I don't. Great.

Suspect B: doesn't call for a week but then bells me Sunday morning 6am to make me come over to his place "come on then babe, I'll pay for the taxi". Sod off.

Suspect C: has a boring sex life with his girlfriend, so wants to come back and have some fun... yeah.

Suspect D: is just filthy as f...

Goddammit. Who the fuck do you think you are. No, worse actually. What the fuck do you think I am?

What else you gonna do on a Saturday...

... but work. Yum.

Got loads of shit at work that needs finishing up- it's so much going on at the moment it's just too easy to completely lose the plot. So I'm here today, working my guts out again. Need to be ready at 3pm for Wigan... this time I even found proper working live-stream so I'm happy as larry.

Announcement last night we'd play the semis at VP, well then... doesn't look like I'll get a ticket for that, and no - spare your thoughts, I won't s*ck anyone's for this, thank you very much.

I'm bit in a bad mood, don't know why exactly. And I don't like people that are not passionate about the things they do. By the way. (Where did this come from now???)

Google & Co.

No no no, I think the company's great, I'd work for them. Errrr. Anyway.

I have this stats tool running - oh yes guys, I know who you are, how much time you spend on my blog, and I bloody don't like you because none of you would ever leave a comment. Back to.... Google. So my stat thingy shows me the referring link, and if this referring link is a search engine, I can see the search terms... still with me?

Top 5 of search terms this week (I'll keep it sort and sweet)

5. steamish
Hello I'm Rashid from Indiaaaaaa. Fuck knows where I have the word "steamish" in my rants but I'm sure it's not what he was looking for

4. Mike Skinner streets bird shagged rumour
At least 3 every week, listen I don't know either, but let me know if you find out...

3. Stoners ethos blog
Somebody keeps coming back but still doesn't know how to add a page to the favourites.

2. Stoners life advice
Don't ask me, mate. Don't get killed?

1. Stoners, typical bedroom
Steamish. Ha!

Right, here's the deal

Don't want to jinx it or anything, but this is the wager of my lifetime. I bet West Ham wins against Chelsea in the FA cup final (if either West Ham or Chelsea don't get in the finals, there's no bet at all).

If I win, I'll get my new tattoo paid by my mate - a cheeky bulldog on the two crossed hammers it will be.

If I loose, I will name my first born after the (deciding) goal scorer.

Now... They won't win of course, but if - the scorer might be Frank? So my first born will be called Frank. If it's a girl she'll be called Pie - that would piss him right off :-D

'appy 'ammers

All afternoon yesterday I was nervous and had butterflies in my stomach - nah, not a bloke, the game!

Jogged all the way home from the station (well it's not far but nevertheless) just to get in 2 minutes before kick off. Happy days, brilliant game, rubbish commentators, fantastic Yossi, Collins, NRC, Deanoooooooooooooo... Hell of a night, took me more than an hour to calm down after the final whistle.

How the hell am I going to get tickets for the semi final? Please, God.

Boleyn banter

2pm matchday @ the boleyn

him: "what's the craic?"
me: "oh sod off with st. patrick's day and their beer is shit anyway"
[...]
me: "so where you from?"
him "Ireland"

oops.

Who the fuck are ya?

Great weekend I had... A piss poor performance against Portsmouth, couldn't believe the lads started singing "going down" when we were three-nil behind. Anyway... went for a quick one at the Vic when Tony and Lee walked in.

Things happen... got royally drunk with them, had a laugh, I'm suffering of serious memory lost (I reckon it's for the best). But I do remember walking back to T's place and then he introduced me to his dad. Errrr. Yeah, great. Good impression I've made I'm sure.

Not much to report, good round of volleyball Sunday night but that's about it... Oh, still haven't slept with him, I think I passed out. Well done me!

Hooked

Taking the bus from home, colours hidden under the jacket. The nearer I get to Upton Park, the more people I see in colours - scarves, shirts, beanies. Smile gets broader. Getting off and hitting the pub for a quiet one. Lots of singing. Slight buzz somewhere in my guts, going dizzy.

Turnstiles. Walking in, pushing my way through and walking up, seeing the pitch and hearing chants. The air is different in there. Clenched fists in my pockets, don't know why. Buzzing. Adrenaline rushes. Checking who's there, a nod here and there, a grin. Waiting for kick-off...

You've seen the match report. It got me hooked and I booked Portsmouth home today, another return at the ticket office, tomorrow's match. What else would you do on a Saturday - "... wanking off to Pop Idols? Coming to terms with your sex-less marriage?"

Anyway. FC Basel drew Boro for the UEFA cup quarter finals. Seriously considering travelling up there. Ok ok. I already checked trains, flights, and how to get tickets for the away block. Guess I'll see a couple of mates there. Good lord.

City here we come

Bloody great night out we had... Bolton for the 5th time this season, and all day yesterday this buzz kept building up - I never needed a drink more than the first pint at the Boleyn.

Pre-match build-up... hang on a minute. Inflatable cheer sticks? Nice for the kids I'm sure, but we ain't no Amis thank you very much. Then there was a pub-singer who completely cocked up bubbles (we're fine doing it ourselves, cheers), but then again - who cares when the boys are playing?

I don't think we played at our best - too many passes off target (way off sometimes), too much (head-) kicking around (fine if you need to get the ball out quickly but then again - at least try to get them to one of our players, please?), and generally I had the impression our boys were actually scared of tackling the Bolton squad. Now, I now Bolton isn't playing the most beautiful football, but that doesn't mean we have to play like girls fearing getting dirty? As in stains on our shorts?

I sometimes wished they would have just gone in - no matter what. There were a couple of good tackles - loved Marlon's when he whisked one of the northern monkeys off the pitch! But then again, especially right after fucking up a pass or a tackle, I had the impression that the players froze in awe for a split second - just long enough for Bolton to take advantage.

And as for the atmosphere - standing a whole game in row G probably says it all.

Going all dizzy

It's just so much going on at the moment... hardly on top (excuse the pun).

Working - not as many success stories as I'd like to have, the new year's started ok but I'm building up the new countries and started from scratch. Should have sent a double-publication live today which didn't happen (the guy doing the DNS entries has left the building, whoey). There's some more to come this quarter, I'll probably just manage to hit the (virtual) targets but still... Pain factor 6/10

Living - cleaned up the flat yesterday, feels so much better now (should have though of before/after evidence). But still, I'm thinking of buying something somewhere. I've got no clue where to start. Buying yes. Budget, probably up to 220k (which is nice). Mortgage not a problem (thanks Dad...) but... Where to buy? And what? And all the "what if" questions, like - what if I get neighbours that are just like me? What if the whole house crashes down after I moved in? What if... Damnit. Pain factor 4/10 (I don't have to, after all).

Blokes - oh yes, blokes. For fuck's sake. They are queuing at the moment but I know exactly what for, so fuck off will ya! Give me a break... Pain factor 8/10 (yes go on I can take some more...).

That's it really - need to go out on a blinder soon again, need a place for my head.

Bolton, West Ham and my streaming knowledge

Kinda zero, when I started. So I knew the boys were playing Saturday afternoon, not many pubs showing it in UK so being in Switzerland... Ten minutes before kick-off I started looking around for a live stream off the internet, eventually found one from Shanghai, rubbish quality - but I got live radio as well so I heard the boys going down... feel sorry for the lads that went to Bolton to see it.

Anyway me dad's here now, better go

Festen

My sister's 20th birthday yesterday - a big thing in CH, just like the 21st in UK. She's organised a strech limo picking us up from home last night and getting us to the club - in style. Wicked night out with the girls (although they're like 10 years younger than me. uh). My sis got ridicilously drunk - just when I got home (took the last train at 2am) I got a phone call her begging me to pick her up from the club. Bless her...

Traditional family party today with 20 people, v nice seeing everybody again. Oh yes and thanks for reminding me constantly, "you're next". With a big birthday that is.

Ricky texted me yesterday, came as a surprise. Didn't hear anything from Tony, bit of a surprise too. Ah well.

Listening to Paolo Conti - thinking of all the good stuff I bought here and I'll take back home.

Just thinking. Tony, that guy, the best not-sex I've had since I came here, honestly. Wasn't my type but after that night, anytime again thanks!!! Phew.

It's the weekend for me...

Right, last day before my long weekend - off on a date tonight, dammit. Haven't been my usual shiny self the last couple of days (PMS kicking in I s'pose) but, whatever. If he can take me in my foul mood it has to be true love...

Can't be arsed tho, and we're going to a boozer nearby. Not that we have much choice, our regular is the only nice one around, and it's our local so there's no point having a "date" there then, innit. Bit scary anyway... Now that I most of the lads at the Vic and we've been having a good time every time a walk in there, one of them has asked me out. Now if I fuck this one up... I'm done. Ah well I'm probably just thinking too much.

A Swiss thing?

I remember going to matches at home, when the speaker announced the players coming onto the pitch...

Home team first: "Number 6, Beni..." - and the whole crowd shouting back his last name: "HUGGEL".

For the guests that was a bit of a different story of course... "Number 1, Stefan..." "ARSCHLOCH" (translation anyone?).

I'm still (slightly) surprised this doesn't happen here. Nope, there's just the speaker reading down the names, some cheering (or booing respectively) and that was that. Is it a Swiss thing, or just a "not english" thing?

Gis that checklist, dear...

... so I went out with my mates last night, the first time I saw them since that night. When Anna arrived (I didn't know she'd be there too) it was a bit weird but once Greg went to get more drinks we had a chat and... all good.

Anyway. Me promising I wouldn't drink Stella anymore (because then I'd want shots. and drugs. and men. any. urgs.) Them saying I need a boyfriend who'd look after me when we go out on a bender. Sweet. As long as they (please!) don't post my profile on internet dating sites and shit... I'll be fine.

Shop your tickets online.

Yeah, FUCKERS, I'm hanging in a phone call with Australia for the last hour and therefore can't call the ticket office, and this fucking server is going down (haha) every time I try to proceed my order.

Oh hang on. CL F 178.

GOT IT! Last game of the season, two days before my birthday and the same afternoon as my bash at night. Yummy...

Freedom of choice

... or what. I'm used to watch football matches standing, and I remember (well sometimes) wishing myself into the seated area. Whereas here (Upton Park that is) they want everybody to sit, for safety reasons.

Is that the same Health & Safety bill that prevents schoolkids from bringing self-made cakes to school? (as happened in 2004 in a very posh Richmond prep school, apparently because one of the kids could [they didn't know] be allergic to nuts. Nuts is exactly the right word for that!)

Anyway. Sitting in row N of the BML stand I expected a song and a dance (literally) but nothing... noooo... all quite. For crying out loud, 12th man fallen ill? From my side of the pitch it honestly did sound like Everton's supporters were twice as loud. Anyway, I imagine the crowd being well different if they'd let us stand (although sitting shouldn't be an excuse for lousy support really, if you ask me), and that's what the guys from Stand up sit down think too.

I can only support this, and that's why I am one of those holding up a yellow card (don't try to spot me on there tho I was further out to the right).

It's like coming home.

Thursday, Friday, Matchday... Woke up at 7am and nearly jumped out my bed - but then realised how early it was. 8am. 9am. 10am - sod it. Quick shower and that, colours on and off we trot.

Made it on the 376 just in time, empty bus - big grin on the driver's face when I got on. 20 minutes to Upton Park, the nearer I got to the ground the bigger my smile got. Off to pub #1 for a pint, on to the next one for another one (warm-up that was) and then (eventually) the Boleyn. F*ck me.

Old sad moaners around me in BML, could have heard a needle drop most of the time, and everyone sitting. Shame.

... more to come but I'm off now for meetings.

It's still haunting me...

So I had this phone call Sunday 8am last week, made me awful at the time but I thought that was it.

I was wrong. She just called again but this time, we had a civilized and actually quite nice chat. Although I've been trying to talk myself out ("are you sure we're talking about the same guy") I don't think I managed. And she had to admit that it takes two, and he probably lied (he did, kind of), that it wasn't the first time, and that he's a wanker (ack).

Feeling awful, but at least I've stopped shaking now. I just hope I'll never see this bloke again, might be in trouble because by the sounds of it, he's being kicked out just about now.

Things happen when you support West Ham

E-mail of the week:

[...] i had a work christmas do on the same night as west ham - leeds last year and i
watched it in the bar we were in. the ladies were all sat down talking, the lads were all stood at the bar and i was stood in the other corner glued to the telly. leeds got an undeserved penalty in the last minute which got them a point and when the decision was made i suddenly screamed "you fucking blind bastard, you blind fucking bastard, you currupt cunt, fucking wanker" and silenced the party. i mean silenced it like a library. there was a particularly memorable "JAMES! LANGUAGE!" from a supervisor and i drowned my sorrows for the rest of the night.

Love it!

Friendly last night

... my boys caning the scots 3-1 in a friendly last night, oh joy... well done boys, something to be proud of! although, looking at the squad, hardly know any of them so I'm off to do some research - left Switzerland too long ago it seems.

looks like I got in...

... just got an email, means invitation, for a girl's 5-a-side in Hackney; so I'll better go and get new boots and shin guards!

Saturday plannings

... and it's only midweek, like... whoey. Anyway I'm in for a treat watching Everton getting caned (I hope) and then I'll meet my mates somewhere in town and go clubbing. At least that's the plan.

Haven't been out with them for a couple of weeks now and I hope Anna got over the shock in the meantime (still have to apologize in person tho), and it's about time we get our little friends out and about.