GOTCHA

Ok, it's about time I bubble a few lines about Internet Dating... Which is generally a good thing, if you're clever and not looking for something serious, that is. 99% of the blokes on those dating sites are up for one thing (just as in real life): the quick shag. But how they get there...

The Up-Front Dater
They're generally good looking and rather smart, admit from the beginning that they're looking for a shag only but are experienced and confident enough to make us girls consider going out with them. Because we're soooo grown up and we can easily handle a Fuck Buddy. Yeye.

The Pretender
This species is very common, not very persuasive when trying to convince girls that they are looking for a girlfriend. Or even worse, marriage (those guys really freak me out). Easy to blow their covers, they're dumb enough to ask the wrong questions. As in bra size. Zonk!

The Poor Sods
With the same target, this bunch of twats has a completely different, yet really bitchy approach. They'd never ever mention "shag" or "girlfriend", as they are still too hurt / still recovering / still getting over their last (long lasting!) relationship. They admit mistakes they made, such as "not paying enough attention" and "not supported them enough". Slowly but steady they start making compliments, praise the girl's ability to cheer them up, and when the time is right - boing, the girl (!) gives out her phone number or suggests a date. We have a winner!!! Although the Poor-Sod approach takes a bit more time, success is almost guaranteed. As the icing on the cake, it gives the guy the perfect reason for a runner - their ex has just come back. Yay!

What about the true, caring, loving, looking guys out there?
Yeah, right. That 1% you mean? Loads of toads to kiss. Chin up!

EDIT: 1% doesn't sound a lot, but 1 in hundred... and who said we don't bump into that one earlier? We'll see...