Empty cans

All the joking is just me trying to distract myself from... what. It's Saturday and the urge is massive, watched Scarface last night - this guy and half a kilo of dope on the table... Want some? I saw him going down, losing the plot, and it reminded me of mates and, worst of all, of myself - but whenever that thought popped into my mind my addicted self found reasons (or excuses?) why I was different.

LCH has posted this link to a guy giving up Charlie. Hm. How sad am I, not saying "right, I'm in", not deleting the Man's number, not admitting to myself I actually do have a drug problem (whoey, I just did).

OK, I'm in.

Been thinking of it for a while (I guess it's like everything else one's trying to give up), but this has given me the kick. My flatmate has just phoned in, he's on the way back from Brum, to tell me he was going to score. I wonder why he did it... He knows I'm flat down broke. I'll phone up my family and check on them, and change into offroad gear to go for a bike ride. Will try to be out and about before my flatmate gets home - it's not easy to say no if you have it in your face, eh.